bioniclecomedycentralfandomcom-20200214-history
Indiana SW and Biofan
At Club Obi-Wan Star Wars is wearing a Indy hat and sitting at a table with some shady Matoran. SW: Why do you guys carry machine guns? Matoran 1: Why do we carry machine guns? I don't know. 2 can you tell us? Matoran 2: Oh our machine guns are like children to us. We can't part with them. Matoran 3: I sold my gun Matoran 1: You monster! SW: That makes perfect sense, none of you could possibly lying at all! Matoran 1: Yes we know it does! Then the beutiful female co star comes out for a musical number SW: Whos she? Matoran 2: Her? Shes nobody but a extra in this comedy SW: Kinda disappointing Matoran 3: 2, 1 I think we ought to advance the plot in this comedy! A waiter brings SW a tall glass or Onion juice. SW gulps it down. SW: Boy do I love my Onion Juice! Matoran 1: Ha! That Onion juice had a deadly poison in it! Matoran 2 : Wait I thought it was the apple juice that we poisoned. Matoran 3: I'm pretty sure it was the Onion Juice SW: Tastes like regular Onion Juice to me. The Matoran ask a waiter Matoran 1: Excuse miss waiter lady what drink did you poison for us? Waiter: Why the apple juice like 2 said and sir. And its Mrs.Waiter Lady now. Matoran 2: *Slaps number 3 in the back* Told you! And wait did she say Mrs. Waiter? Waiter: Yes Matoran 2: Marla when did this happen? I THOUGHT WE WERE SOUL MATES! Waiter: 2 we broke up 5 years ago get over it Matoran 2: BUT I CAN'T GET OVER LOVVVVVEEEEEEE! Waiter walks away. Matoran 3 is scared. Matoran 3: Guys I drunk the apple juice. Matoran 1: 0_0 Matoran 2: CARLLLLLLAAAAAA I MEAN MARLLAAAAA WHYYYYYYYYYYY??????!!! *Cries* Matoran 3: Bye guys X_X Matoran 3 drops dead. SW: Well that wasn't weird at all. Matoran 1: Now that you see that we planned to betray you we have to kill you. Waiter: Heres your check sirs Matoran 2: Marla I love you! Oh darn thats a expensive check... I better get out of here. Matoran 2 runs away. Matoran 1: Well I guess I'm only the only here to kill you. SW: Thats nice. :) Matoran picks up machine gun but SW punches him out. SW: Fatality! He runs out while other Matoran with machine guns fire at him for no reason at all. He runs out to his limo crashing through the roof. Biofan is his driver. Fan1: So how was the dinner? SW: Terrible all I had was juice! Fan1: So I don't get a togo steak? SW: No stake Fan1: :( SW: Perhaps you should drive before we get shot Fan1: Righhtttt did I mention that I don't know how to drive SW: No! *Angry* Why didn't you tell me that before I'd hired you! Fan1: Well would you have hired me if I did tell you that? SW:Nope Fan1: Now you see why I didn't tell you. SW: Just drive! Fan1: Bossy, bossy I deaserve more than what I'm being paid. SW: Whats it take to get you to drive? Fan1: 19.95 with shipping and handling SW: *Angry* Shipping and handling! Fan1: Yeah! What are you a cheap scape? SW pays so he can not get shot and Biofan drives away really quickly cause they are being shot. You'd drive quickly too. Fan1 turns on the wind shield wipers. SW: Why are you turning on the wipers? Fan1: Why not, wind shield wipers are the greatest invention of mankind? SW: No they're not! Fan1: Yeah they are! Just look how they move back and forth! *Points at them and watches them over and over* SW: Watch the road! The limo makes a sharp turn hitting a trash can. Spalashing a nerdy teenager with a blue jacket hanging out with a beutiful redhead. Teenager: Thats the ol' And before he could finish his sentence this comedy moves on to the next scene. Fan1: Also this screen is really dirty do you see how many Geonosians and Insecticons that have hit this screen? Random bug on the wind shield: Why universe hate Waspinator? Meh these references are boring. SW: We've got to find the Ark of the Covenant! Fan1: We do? Did you ask God where it was first? SW: No not that one the Raiders prop! Fan1: Oh now thats more practical. SW: Exactly and I can't imagine a lot of people wanting that Fan1: So where is it? SW: Lets try Skywalker Ranch! At Skywalker Ranch. Fan1: I'm disappointed to find this place isn't a actual ranch. I expected a small western town. SW: Awesome but impractical Fan1: I'll just tap my legs and maybe it will be as I envisioned it! SW: That just takes us home. Biofan taps his legs and instantly is exactly as he envisioned it! SW: I stand corrected Then weird guys with swords come out. Fan1: Who are you guys? Sword guy 1: Us? We're no one? Sword guy 2: Live from New York its Saturday Nightlive! Sword guy 3: Yeah thats exactly what we are! SW: Nobody is falling for that. Fan1: Wow, we're on TV! Sword guy 1: Yeah now give us the Ark and nobody will get hurt! SW: Sorry but we don't have it! Sword guy 2: Say whattttt? Fan1: Yeah I think you guys should have come a little later than this. Sword guy 3: Yeah we should have read the script Fan1: 2! Theres a rattlesnake right at your foot! 2 looks down and sees there is no rattlesnake Sword guy 2: Hey you tricked me! Sword guy 3: AHHHHHHHH I JUST GOT BIT BY A RATTLESNAKE! Fan1: Oh sorry you guys all look the same and stuff Sword guy 3: I'm dead like the other number 3 too! X_X Sword guy 1's watch beeps. Sword guy 1: Oh um sorry I gotta go. I have piano lessons! Sword guy 2: You decicde to take piano lesson right before we get a job as a badguys? Sword guy 1: Yeah it wasn't my most well thought idea. *Sighs* SW: So we gonna fight or what? Sword guy 2: Yeah I guess we are just let me tie my shoes first. Biofan picks up a rock and throws it at the swordman. Knocking him out. The other leaves for piano lessons. SW: I suppose thats one way of doing things Fan1: Lets find that Ark already SW: I think we gotta dig for it or something. Fan1: Maybe its just right around the corner Shockwave: Illogical Fan1: Shockwave? What are you doing here? Shockwave: Even logic cannot answer it Sandtrooper: Look sir droids! SW and Biofan turn around a corner and they find the Ark of the Convenant prop! SW: What do you know it actually is right around the corner. Shockwave: It defies all logic, does not compute! DOES NOT COMPUTE! CIRCUITS EXPLODING! I CAN'T DO THAT FOR YOU HAL,ONLY ON THE HUBBBBBB, DANGER WILL ROBINSON! *Falls over and sticks finger up* You got mail! *Explodes* Fan1: Aw I wanted to see what my mail was.... They load the Ark onto the top of the limo. SW: What about Shockwave? Fan1: You wanna carry him all the way home? SW: Point noted They drive off leaving Shockwave. Sandtrooper: Look sir Transformers! Fan1: What ever you do don't open the Ark! SW: Its not the real Ark! Fan1: Still SW: Whatever Fan1: Oh my gosh look at that fool in the road! He's aiming at us with a bazooka! Must be duck hunting, but he shouldn't be standing the middle of the road! SW: Wait did you say bazooka? KABOOOOOOMMMMMMMM! The car crashes and our heroes get out. SW: That can only mean Mini Lewa! Out of the smoke comes Mini Lewa armed with his trademarked bazooka. ML: Yes it is me here to kill you and take the Ark! Fan1: You can't take it! Its ours! ML: Thats why I'm stealing it. Fan1: Oh right! SW: We can't let take the Ark! Its our Macguffin! Fan1: Yeah! SW: Looks like we have a fight on our hands! Fan1: Just don't open the Ark! SW takes out a sword and so does ML! SW: Biofan do something useful! Fan1: Alright! I'll make some popcorn! ML: Thats a good idea! SW: Now I'm hungry They clash with swords while Biofan eats popcorn. Duel of the Fates play. SW hums it while fighting. ML: Stop humming! Nobody can hear the music when you're humming it! SW: Meh Fan1: This popcorn needs more salt. I wonder if George Lucas put some in the Ark. Fan1 opens up the Ark and it glows! ML: Biofan you fool! The special effects team have been sealed in that prop for years! SW: Sounds crowded ML: Were all doomed! The people float around doing nothing. Person 1: Hey can I have some popcorn? Biofan hands him some popcorn. Fan1: Shouldn't you be haunting or something? Person 1: Were just happy to be free! SW: Good! Could you get rid of that green guy over there? Person 1: I suppose so, special effects crew get that weird green guy! They all carry Mini Lewa up and throw him off a cliff with a bunch of crocdiles with a bunch of ants. ML: I'll return in the sequel! Fan1: *shouting* There is no sequel! SW: Not to mention you'll be dead! ML: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO The End